Though I rarely make New Year's Resolutions, there are always things I desire to accomplish, areas I wish to improve. To be honest, the main reason I shy away from weighty annual declarations is my propensity to be more of a starter than a finisher; just ask the 101 incomplete projects laying around my house (if you can find them).
Oh, I spend a lot of time preparing to start. Unfortunately, most of my time and energy is expended in initial stages. First, there's the abundance of good habits from which to choose: becoming more organized by creating schedules, spreadsheets, systems; saving money by following savings blogs, clipping or printing (and remembering to use) coupons; meal planning, exercising, eating right, and the list goes on. Then, because I'm an information gatherer (and still haven't settled on the habit to put into practice), I spend oodles of time on the world wide web determining how other people have ordered their habits. This frequently leads to the discovery of yet another fantastic habit (and free charts and printables.)
Undoubtedly, my organized, focused, and administratively gifted friends are sadly shaking their heads by now. I am, too! My husband would be nodding his head. In agreement. He's witnessed this frenzy countless times, and still he loves me.
Recently, while perusing a myriad of tips and tidbits, I heard it. That still, small voice as it whispered, "one thing." The arrow hit it's mark. The point hit home. Choosing habits to pursue and resolutions to make isn't wrong, but if I think tasks are the key to fixing my life, I'm missing the one thing that is necessary. There are countless great patterns and practices; however, if adding them is my idea and not His, I am distracted and pulled. I am bypassing the Solution for an alternative that will not last. I know because I've done it too many times.
Don't get me wrong, this year I will make lists, I will plan meals, I will aim to save money (and try to remember to use coupons), I may even learn to make a spreadsheet without throwing a techno-tantrum; but above all, I want to choose the good portion. I won't find it on a calendar, chart, or checklist; I will receive it as I sit at the feet of my King.
"The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot...
You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore."
Psalm 16:5,11
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Thursday, December 29, 2011
And There's the Other Problem
Okay, okay, Martha had a problem: distracted, anxious, troubled, worried, bothered... Just as evidenced in my conversation with my husband (You See, There's the Problem), we can acknowledge the problem, but if it is while our hands are on our hips, our eyes are rolling, our mouths are spouting our defense, and our foot is nervously tapping to get back to it, we're missing the other problem. And the other problem is BIG.
One of the issues in the debate over Mary and Martha is that too often we jump to Martha's defense because we see ourselves in her. It doesn't matter what type (A, B, whatever) you are, I'm betting some chocolate you've been distracted, anxious, troubled, worried, bothered. Hasn't everyone? Certainly it's okay, right? I mean, it's not something that would land us on America's Most Wanted. So, we surmise our behavior is defendable. We assume if we're doing something helpful, we are in the clear (even if it causes us to be a tad on edge.)
Another flaw in the debate comes when we allow our minds to twist the image of Mary so the scale tips in favor of her hard-working sister. Maybe I'm the only one who has done it; but if you've stood up for Martha, tell me you didn't envision Mary sitting among the men in the living room batting her eyes, tilting her head, and tee-heeing at everything they said. So wrong, but so often our nature. When we're caught on our heels, we desperately want to find something wrong with someone else, even if it's far from the truth.
The biggest issue in the debate is that when we are defending Martha, we are arguing with Jesus. Let that sink in for a minute. Actually, let it soak in. Take a deep breath, let it out, clear away any of the "but" arguments left, and listen to Him:
"Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:40-42
You see, Martha's problem wasn't in the serving. Her problem was in her heart. She was so pulled she neglected the one thing that was necessary. I'm thankful this "one thing" isn't unknown. Jesus wasn't being cunning like Curly in City Slickers or curious like Teddy in Night at the Museum. He clearly and (I believe) tenderly identified the problem, and He presented the solution.
Funny thing that Martha had walked right up to the Solution. Do you think she failed to recognize it because she'd already determined her own quick fix? For someone like me who wants the details, it's hard not to wonder about Martha's response. What did she say? What did she do? How long did it take before she fell to her knees? While some specifics are left out, we can be sure the key point is not. What was the good portion? Remember what Mary had been doing before Martha bustled in:
And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching.
Mary wasn't trying to irritate her sister or get out of work. She wasn't flighty or flirty. Her intentions were pure, her method sure. Mary was fully in the moment, and she was captivated by her King. I want to live in that moment.
One of the issues in the debate over Mary and Martha is that too often we jump to Martha's defense because we see ourselves in her. It doesn't matter what type (A, B, whatever) you are, I'm betting some chocolate you've been distracted, anxious, troubled, worried, bothered. Hasn't everyone? Certainly it's okay, right? I mean, it's not something that would land us on America's Most Wanted. So, we surmise our behavior is defendable. We assume if we're doing something helpful, we are in the clear (even if it causes us to be a tad on edge.)
Another flaw in the debate comes when we allow our minds to twist the image of Mary so the scale tips in favor of her hard-working sister. Maybe I'm the only one who has done it; but if you've stood up for Martha, tell me you didn't envision Mary sitting among the men in the living room batting her eyes, tilting her head, and tee-heeing at everything they said. So wrong, but so often our nature. When we're caught on our heels, we desperately want to find something wrong with someone else, even if it's far from the truth.
The biggest issue in the debate is that when we are defending Martha, we are arguing with Jesus. Let that sink in for a minute. Actually, let it soak in. Take a deep breath, let it out, clear away any of the "but" arguments left, and listen to Him:
"Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:40-42
You see, Martha's problem wasn't in the serving. Her problem was in her heart. She was so pulled she neglected the one thing that was necessary. I'm thankful this "one thing" isn't unknown. Jesus wasn't being cunning like Curly in City Slickers or curious like Teddy in Night at the Museum. He clearly and (I believe) tenderly identified the problem, and He presented the solution.
Funny thing that Martha had walked right up to the Solution. Do you think she failed to recognize it because she'd already determined her own quick fix? For someone like me who wants the details, it's hard not to wonder about Martha's response. What did she say? What did she do? How long did it take before she fell to her knees? While some specifics are left out, we can be sure the key point is not. What was the good portion? Remember what Mary had been doing before Martha bustled in:
And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching.
Mary wasn't trying to irritate her sister or get out of work. She wasn't flighty or flirty. Her intentions were pure, her method sure. Mary was fully in the moment, and she was captivated by her King. I want to live in that moment.
You See, There's the Problem
You want to rile a group of Christian women in no time flat? Bring up Mary and Martha; you know the sisters in Luke. I'm willing to bet (figuratively, not in the gambling sense unless you're talking chocolate; then it's double or nothing) that within a matter of minutes, probably seconds, someone starts defending Martha.
"But, Martha was serving! Someone had to do it. Mary was just sitting there. Of course, Martha was irritated. I would be too doing all that work, for all those people, all by myself. You know those men weren't helping. Martha gets a bad rap. It's not fair."
The arguments may vary, but the sentiments are the same. As women, we're tired; we live out the saying every day (& night): A woman's work is never done. It's exhausting; and it's worse when we feel unappreciated or ignored by those we think could lighten the load. I intentionally said when we feel.
I entered December feeling much like Martha. For most women, December in America can easily be draining. The tyranny of the urgent was pressing and I was sinking. Mary wasn't sitting in my living room, but had she been, I surely would have stomped my foot and said, "Lord, tell her to help me! Am I going to have to coordinate her Christmas wishlist, take care of prepping her for the Christmas card photos (her hair hasn't been trimmed in ages), buy presents for everyone in her family, wash her clothes, buy her groceries and cook for her, too?" Because that would have put me over the edge I tell you.
My husband tried to encourage me to relax, but I jumped to my defense as quickly as we jump to Martha's. "Sure I should take a break, but how will all these things get done? Cause you know what? [I'm pretty sure my hands were on my hips by now] If it doesn't happen, no one will say, 'I can't believe that husband didn't get "x" taken care of.' Nope. All you have to do is work and buy me a present and you're good." I'm not proud of it, but I admit it. I was c.r.a.n.k.y. Make that "c" Capital.
You see, my problem was the same as Martha's. Luke 10:40-41 tell us that Martha was distracted, anxious, troubled, worried, bothered, and so pulled that she neglected the one thing that was necessary.
"But, Martha was serving! Someone had to do it. Mary was just sitting there. Of course, Martha was irritated. I would be too doing all that work, for all those people, all by myself. You know those men weren't helping. Martha gets a bad rap. It's not fair."
The arguments may vary, but the sentiments are the same. As women, we're tired; we live out the saying every day (& night): A woman's work is never done. It's exhausting; and it's worse when we feel unappreciated or ignored by those we think could lighten the load. I intentionally said when we feel.
I entered December feeling much like Martha. For most women, December in America can easily be draining. The tyranny of the urgent was pressing and I was sinking. Mary wasn't sitting in my living room, but had she been, I surely would have stomped my foot and said, "Lord, tell her to help me! Am I going to have to coordinate her Christmas wishlist, take care of prepping her for the Christmas card photos (her hair hasn't been trimmed in ages), buy presents for everyone in her family, wash her clothes, buy her groceries and cook for her, too?" Because that would have put me over the edge I tell you.
My husband tried to encourage me to relax, but I jumped to my defense as quickly as we jump to Martha's. "Sure I should take a break, but how will all these things get done? Cause you know what? [I'm pretty sure my hands were on my hips by now] If it doesn't happen, no one will say, 'I can't believe that husband didn't get "x" taken care of.' Nope. All you have to do is work and buy me a present and you're good." I'm not proud of it, but I admit it. I was c.r.a.n.k.y. Make that "c" Capital.
You see, my problem was the same as Martha's. Luke 10:40-41 tell us that Martha was distracted, anxious, troubled, worried, bothered, and so pulled that she neglected the one thing that was necessary.
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